What Collapses Me Expands Me: Meditations for Solstice from the Deep Divers

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Last night’s solstice prep deep dive was a miracle. I am so grateful to everyone who participated in the quieter darker, less on camera way that felt so right for last night. We practiced silence. We investigated our rib cages. We pondered what are we doing to protect our hearts? What do we want to open our hearts up to in this new decade? What are the practices and beings that support our openness. It was a journey. Trust came up again and again and I am grateful for the folks who decided to trust ourselves and each other by participating in the space in whatever ways we did. I am grateful for your participation right now. Below is a poem we created of the affirmations that we want to ground and hold us as we navigate these darkest days. As usual, this poem is wonderful to read aloud. See if there is a particular line or set of lines that you want to meditate with this solstice.

Oh and our last writing intensive of the year “Cycles: The Unlearning Intensive” is next weekend. More info here: http://brillianceremastered.alexispauline.com/2019/12/16/cycles-the-unlearning-intensive/

Love,

Alexis

What. Me.

by the participants in Brilliance Remasterd’s Deep Dive Solstice Prep: Black Feminist Lessons from Marine Mammals

“deep in the ocean there is pressure. a lot of pressure. it will press on your chest and your lungs will collapse. you call it heartbreak. it is not. it is how what made you embraces you. reshapes you. welcomes you back. let it happen.”

-from Seven. Dive Deeper. (APG)

 

what breaks me births me

what collapses me expands me

what softens me keeps me fierce

who breathes with me loves me

what teaches me acknowledges me

what loves me strengthens me

what sees me knows me

what knows me builds me

what pleasures me nourishes me

what creates me enjoys me

what enjoys me will recall me

what moves me motivates me

what leaves me returns me

what abandons me frees me

what empties me opens me

what opens me strengthens me

what breaks my heart transforms me

what has been lost to me shapeshifts me

what dreams me confirms me

what calls me will keep calling me

what scares me stretches me

what stretches me opens me

what reminds me centers me

what comforts me holds me

what inspires me sustains me

what intrigues me humanizes me

what connects me teaches me

what hails me hushes me

what heals me loves me

what nourishes me finds me

what lulls me can wake me

what wakes me knows me better

what feeds me deepens me

what calls me deepens me

what i desire roots me

what grounds me fruits me 

what ruptures me transforms me

what abuses me shames me

what poisons me takes me

what poisons me exits me

what angers me motivates me

what oppresses me agitates me

what concerns me organizes me

what kills me reveres me

what judges me forgives me

what shames me falls before me

what broke me was not the end of me

the love of god made me

the love of god embraces me

what hears me answers me

what whispers to me ignites me

what challenges me sharpens me

what captures me lifts me

what breaks me perfects me

what speaks to me writes me

what me what me

what is me

what was me

what will be me

what feels me is me

what terrifies me is me

what destroys me rebirths me is me

Alexis Pauline Gumbs